Friday, December 2, 2011

Armani Luminous Silk Foundation

RATING (out of 5 stars): 1.5 stars

COST: $59 for 1 ounce

THE SKINNY: I had really, really wanted to like this foundation. Reading reviews, this was the
foundational equivalent to Ewan McGregor showing up on my doorstep with a Starbucks venti in one hand and Perugina chocolates in the other — nothing short of miraculous. When I found myself at Saks in New Orleans and came across the Armani counter, I knew I had to bite the bullet, pay BIG bucks and try this miracle in a bottle. I can justify vacation spending much easier than say, shopping on my laptop while watching the Dance Moms marathon.

I was very excited to see that Armani carries a shade light enough for me, “light ivory,” which is just a prettier way of saying “pasty.” I was so enthusiastic that I even let the sales guy talk me into buying the special Armani foundation brush (which for the price of $35 must have been made with the hair of a rare Himalayan frost yak or yeti or something completely ridiculous). I was all set to drink the Kool Aid and prepare to gush right along with the hoards of fans.

Unfortunately, the delusions of spinning around while singing on a mountain top with perfect looking skin ended when I got home. The bottle is a pump dispenser, which means lots of product left congregating in the bottom (and for $60, you should be able to wring it like a wet rag to get
every single expensive drop of miracle). I applied it diligently with my frost yak brush, stippling as I went (I listened to the sales guy) and it took a long time to get it right. It had a light feel for a foundation and coverage was good. For a while.

Within two hours, the miracle in a bottle had ran. And slid. And puddled. And pooled. I looked like I had been running a marathon. (Stop laughing, I can run … if something is chasing me.) My skin was a hot mess. This was after I had prepped the canvas using Armani primer. And applying with the rare Himalayan yak brush! I tried to work out this relationship. I needed it to work. I tried different approaches to coax it into staying in place — no primer, fingertip application, sponge application, setting with powder. Zip. Zilch. Nada. I filed for divorce two weeks later, citing irreconcilable differences. My oily skin simply could not get along with its hydrating ways.

KEEP OR TOSS: Toss if you have oily skin. Extremely expensive and will not adhere to oily skin. Although, I couldn’t bear to throw the bottle away. I keep it tucked away in my makeup drawer and look at it longingly and think back to the days I used to have such high hopes for our happily ever after.

CHECK IT OUT: For the complete line of Armani beauty products visit Armani Beauty USA.

-- Tested by Laura

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